Og, so sorry for ur loss, my condolences to you and your family....May allah grant ur father jannah and may He also comfort u in these trying times... Peace

For most ppl, it shouldnt really be a problem praying at work...from the beginning, tell ur supervisor that ud need time to pray and perhaps ask them if theres a room available u can use...if they wont help u, take the initiave to find a quiet spot to perform ur daily requirements...no good excuses not to...'cause on judgement day, u dont wanna be in front of God and say..."see, what had happened was...."... Fortunately, I have a good place to pray at work and it doesnt interfere with my job...a quiet room with an occupied sign so that no janitor bursts in and disrupt the prayer...im one of two muslim girls that i know of, and she doesnt pray but after she noticed me taking time off, she asked if she could pray with me....at first she feared she would be discriminated against but after seeing me, it gave her the courage to join me... we have some muslim guys that go to friday prayers during their lunch hr and management agreed to give them that time off....so its pretty good deal for them.. p.s.-most of us let prayers revolve around our lives rather than makin prayers the center of our lives and everything else revolving around it Peace

Leader Test Results hehe...im Ghandi....more laughable...Viking...as mother theresa...u always looked great in ur toothless grin:)

^^... :rolleyes: ...who says anything about digging? Labor is for those beneath me, can i enlist u?

5 yrs older? that's nothing....go for 30yrs older...chances are they will die earlier and u can collect on their life insurance..

Didn't need a quiz to tell me that Men See You As Desirable Men often find you immediately attractive and sensual You're honesty is refreshingly beautiful ... it draws guys in You are also able to be open with your feelings with no emotional baggage Packing light means you enjoy new relationships easily

Pacifist, excellent choices, great minds think alike:)....i loved legend of the falls as well...not only for the eye candy but the story line... Lander...hm...doesn't my avatar speak for itself? ...don't worry, ur still on my good list, u've yet to enter the bombing zone...as long as u know who's boss eh...

Now now Lander, sounds like ur itching for a fight...u hated pretty woman? as if! ... I agree with u though, those not so scary movies w/o a plot other than just dragging it along...namely SAW, i hated it that movie.... Best movies: this yr was Hotel Rwanda-overall my favs were anything from Kevin Spacey-(usual suspect, Life of david gale)...Shawshank Redemption, Troy, Samurai Warrior to name a few.. p.s.-nothing wrong with a sappy movie here and there, and any man who sits through it is completely comfortable with his masculinity ...take that lander... Peace

Chastity has and will always matter, simply because its a major component of our religion and anyone who deviates from it shall be dealt with on Judgement day. It became fashionable for the boys to lose their virginity at a young age and brag about it and some chics doing it on the sly in the hopes of not being branded a tad loose, but bottom line...chaste men deserve chaste women and chaste women deserve chaste men like the quran says. Now, remember, u may be called a stud in this world by how many cherries u may have popped, i doubt that will help u in hellfire ...beware!

^^ I agree. The main danger in being too tribalistic is that ideas of superiority and inferiority enter the picture. Ppl thinking their tribe is better than another, killing solely for that purpose,forgetting that b4 anything, we should identity ourselves as muslims, part of a larger ummah and shouldn't fall prey to the divisions mostly created by the colonizers. Making their work easier by continually in-fighting ....just saw Hotel Rwanda last night, and again, brought to surface how sometimes clanism/tribalism can poison the minds when misused and abused...and made me sick...left feeling like i would shoot anyone else who talked about tribes(which is superior and what not)...and made me also wanna leave the larger international community (west) a lil present in the form of a bomb :mad:

Tamina...excellent points, u basically answered the skeptics with the same thoughts i had...i wish there was more somalis...although im happy to say i saw a lot of sisters...yet very few somali men...(with the lowered gaze of course) ....instead of complaining about what u didnt agree with..show us proof...because all the sheikhs showed sunnahs, quran verses...the context which things were said, etc...i dont think any of them were sugarcoating anything....like Tamina said..bottom line... was to unite the ummah...practice the deen as it should be and not in the slant of our cultures...follow the sunnah of the Prophet (saw)...and do as he did...if theres anything he didnt do, dont do it urself....forgiveness, gentleness...justice...all embody what Islam stands for...and what we must all strive to do as much as we can of it.. memorable quotes..: "how many ppl cry for their kids when they are dead and wonder, would they go to jannah or hell, instead of wondering, how will my kids live when im off the face of the earth" "life is so short, why waste it on hate when theres not enuff time to love?" Peace

Its easy to point the finger and label the gals w/o hijab hookers in a sense, when at the same time, we have all seen the other side, where some, while donning the islamic garb, do worse than a gal that merely revealed her hair....don't lump gals w.o hijab as the same as those wearing revealing clothes...its not that black and white....i may reveal my hair, but i guarantee im more covered up than some fake hijabi....not to say all are fake as well...hopefully one day i'll join the ranks inshallah....in any case..its easy to point the finger at what a female should wear, her hijab, men also have hijab...how many of u wear muslim garb men? pants to ur ankle? huh? well...ur all hoodlums, no good then arent ya...since ur not islamic..personally...i find the men who wear the islamic garb "sexy"..and those of u who don't...i shall classify u as immoral...fair aint it?...now...im waitin for the answer....who wears it? with the hat and full beard?...huh?

The 3rd annual "Reviving the Islamic spirit" conference, was a great success. Over 13,000-15 000 ppl from all over canada and the states, have gathered to honor and learn about the legacy of the Prophet, (s.a.w.), a great and worthy experience. Personally it has revived my spirit, reawakened my committment to my faith, and I congratulate the youth for putting the conference together in order to unite the ummah. All the speakers were great, and my favorites were Dr. Tareq Suwaidan, Shaykh Hamza Yusuf, Imam Zaid Shakir, Dr, Zakir Naik, Imam Mokhtar, Imam Abdullah Hakim Quick, Suliman Mulla, Bilal Philips, Sami Yusuf, and Qari Haseen Rasool, who has the most beautiful voice I've ever heard, performing the Adhaan, on Friday i believe. For those of you who couldn't make it, I'd like to share the most touching and memorable moments for me in the conference. Dr. Tareq Suwaidan-"Gender Bias or gender balance" lecture dispelled a lot of myths and misunderstanding ppl have about Islam. He used the quran and hadiths to prove his points, and encouraged all to not take things out of context, such as a woman's inheritance being half of a man's-he said that only happens on certain occasions, but there may be time she gets more, or less, and that there are 19 other ways (those who took notes can expand on that)....as for a needing 2 women to make the witness of one man, that is only for financial matters, since it has been proven by science women tend to be weaker in math and stronger in humanities, but he also stressed, if there was a woman who was great in math, but the man was weak, her witness would be taken and not his....so therefore its gender balance and all is done for a reason... he also talked about the treatment of wives, how just as the Prophet, (saw), consulted his wives, so should all, and treat them with the kindness they deserve. The issue of beating, according to Dr. Tareq, was unislamic, because the word "edribohon" used in the quran has 3 meanings in arabic, and any issue that scholars disagree on, they must then look to the Prophet (saw) ways, and not once has he ever beaten any of his wives, in fact, when nothing worked to discipline them, such as 1-admonishing them, 2-leaving their beds, finally, he just left the house...and that should be a great lesson to all, and will indeed cut down domestic violence if we follow the sunnah. Dr. Tareq also called for women to take on leadership positions, how the issue of voting was a non issue since women back then have always voted-example-when ppl had to choose btwn Uthman and Ali, a man went to every door, asked all men and women, for who they wanted, so he admonished his native Kuwait and Saudi Arabia for holding back women and their rights that Islam has long ago granted. Imam Zaid Shakir, as always was great and what stood out for me in his lecture is when he said, (i think it was him)....instead of praying to God that the unbelievers go to hell, let's pray for their guidance, because if we look, some of the great men we look up to today, such as Omar, the 2nd Caliph, hated Islam before Allah guided him to the true path... Dr. Zaid Naik, was an unbelievable memory machine...his lecture on the prophecies that were told in all the great books, including Judaism, Christianity, Buddhism, etc...all profecied the coming of the Prophet, peace be upon him...and he also gave every verse, book, chapter, all from the top of his head, and the crowd and the other shaykhs were amazed...someone asked him how he was able to retain all those infos from all those different religions and he informed us he went into training and that anyone can do it...gives great hopes to all of us to one day possess one 10th of his memory... Imam Mokhtar lecture on the last day, the day the Prophet, (saw) passed away, was so moving, brought tears not only to his eyes but also the crowd. His gentle ways of presenting the life and death of the Prophet (saw) was with such love and devotion inspired one and all. p.s.-on the second day of the 3 day conference, on christmas day, a young lady decided to become a muslim and take the shahada in front of all, after listening to all the speakers messages about Islam, a religion of peace, justice, unity. Peace

Real love happens after marriage, when the couple may experience hard times but they are still together, determined to make it work, while lust, is the initial attraction but ultimately cannot sustain a long term relaitonship. "Should we follow our emotions or intellect in choosing a marriage partner? Chosing emotions can be detrimental to the couple, intellect alone can be boring, so an orderly combination is needed, but how?" Emotional ties, intellectual harmony, strong faith, all are needed when choosing a life partner, the hard part is, finding out all that, establishing emotional ties, without breaking Islamic rules of conduct, thats the real test. id love to see some practical solutions others may have. peace

Gedid, believe it or not, I do agree with most of your points and its just a dif example of what's happening in our society...and TM...i understand about the idea that God will bless us with what HE wants us to have, which we can't change...but my point was....i don't advocate for divorce on something trivial,and should be a last resort, as it is the most hated thing in our religion...but im talking about real issues that are often taboo in our culture, for ex. abuse...women are usually told, go back to the man, work it out...when in reality, the fault lies with the man and he should seek help if he wants his family to last....so what would u advise that woman? stay in an unhealthy relationship just so she won't be gossiped about or advise her to seek better alternatives....and yeah, there are examples of women causing break ups...but i disagree with the blame put on the women.. Yes...most single moms in the west aren't educated, but that is a problem that needs to be addressed....and just b/c she isnt, doesnt mean its better for her and her kids to stay...education and independence contrary to popular belief isn't the culprit in causing divorce, its the unwillingness of partners to compromise, work together for a common goal...and when one wants supremacy over the other, there lies the evil... ...to the point that u can live on one income...u can, but how well? doesnt mean u need 10 tvs in ur house, im talking basics....and why not put money into kids future education instead of living day to day? I agree with the notion that both partners can work, but once kids come into the picture, the mom or whoever is making less of an income can stay home with the kids until they reach school age....and then are free to pursue their careers at that time...so family won't be sacrificed...and face it...its hard living in the west and most ppl wouldn't need 2 incomes if they didnt have to.... peace

^^TM...shocking to blame it squarely on the women, needless to say I respectfully disagree and these are my reasons... Single moms are truly the most put down women in our society and its a shame because contrary to many beliefs most haven't asked for that burden.They are the true backbone of society, the pillar of strength, dealing with an impossible situation of being in a new country and adjusting to it all the while dealing with society pointing fingers at them... TM- to respond to ur first point, how back home ppl weren't allowed to easily leave a marriage, I actually prefer that someone isnt there forcing me or guilting me into staying in an unhappy union, if God has allowed me the choice of divorce, why should my culture be in the way? Im not saying, divorce at the 1st sign of trouble, but theres only so much someone can take and who is society to stand in the way....i believe that old mentality of basically forcing a couple to stay together is unhealthy, not only for both mates, but their children as well...u only have to look at stats to show ya how kids growing up in abusive homes end up...(not just physically but mentally)... Ur second point-about blatantly blaming the women and not once contructively criticising our male counterparts strikes me as narrow minded...and no, i do not buy the notion homes are breaking up because women are competing with men...they are breaking up because men have lacked what it took to step up to the plate....ex..-moving to the west..being on welfare...the husband thinking why settle for being a taxi driver when i can be CEO, therefore refusing any job that would feed his family b/c his pride is in the way....and what some have resorted to, is wasting their time on unworthy endeavors, such as khat meetings aka coffee shops 9-5, as if it was a full time job...neglecting their wives not to mention the children...now the woman is left at home, taking welfare, raising 6.5 kids, worrying about the bills, their food, cleaning the house, while the husband is MIA....now...thats one example of whats happening to many families....resulting in kids being raised by a single mom that is forced to seek employment in order to better the lives of her kids....and it truly makes me sick to see ppl who blame them for only doing their job... Now...about women who choose to work....if a husband would leave his wife for that...not her fault....we are allowed to pursue education and work, and i challenge anyone to show me a household in the disapora who can live on one income w/o depriving themselves of many opportunities and a better quality of life....being that the average somali family is over 5 kids, how can one income cover that, not to mention bills, their food, clothing, etc....thats a heavy burden on the husband and its commendable those striving to do that on their own, but do not shun the sisters who wanna help out their mates and relieve some of the stress....which leads to them often working overtime...no time with family...and how is that beneficial at the end of the day? ..the repercussions of absentee fathers can be seen today, in the many male youths joining so called gangs and needlessly taking each others lives, drinking, dropping out of school...and thats b/c a solid father figure isnt around, not just those that have separated from their wives, but those that are still married to them yet not fulfilling their role...thats the true shame.... p.s.-i can almost understand the psyche of the modern somali man that grew up back home...there, he enjoyed a life where he had a decent living, that was enuff for the fam, had a wife at home, maids to see to their needs, almost stress-free lives...and to come here, learn a new language, be forced to take a job that back then would have been laughable to them, can be humiliating, being that their status is demoted....but one must suck it up...no one asked to be here, and thats the price we pay for civil war... Peace

Hmmm....is someone looking for sympathy? Let's see...first ladies in the western world aren't good enuff, due to their "too-modern" ideas, god forbid if ur asked to take out the trash, but now, the ladies that were so revered, from the bush, have come back to bite u eh...now they are the gold diggers huh....sweet justice ....which brings the ladies to an impossible position, they get judged for growing up in the West, but now the ones back home have a gold-digger stamp on their forhead...damned if u do, damned if u dont.. In any case, men who search for the meek xalimo deserves their due...they are not man enuff to challenge the stronger willed ladies, so they search for someone submissive that won't utter a word if they are treated like a doormat...but now those supposedly meek xalimos have proven to be the smart ones...capitalized on these men's arrogance and thought..."let me go to hollywood" ...get the man to bring her here, and once her papers are all in order, asta lavista farah....the next phase begins.."oh where are thou jerome"? ... peace

^^...why do women love diamonds? why do men love sports? ..one of those unexplainable things... In truth, I don't agree with this culture that tells a man in order to show his love he must get her the biggest diamond ring, only then would his love be true...ie-look at the media, commercials...all directed at men.."this yr, tell her she's ur true love with this 5 karat ring".... Yes...i won't lie, no gurl would turn down a diamond, but at the same time, any loser can easily accumulate the cash and buyit, wouldn't change the core of who he is at the end of the day....so as cliche as it sounds, the person matters more than the gift (hope they buy it) .....u can also look at it as gold, lots of women, somali women love to receive it and have it in their possession ....hope this clarifies it, least from my point of view... p.s.-suggestions for an orginal gift?-how about a thoughtful letter, poem, song...etc.... peace

leap...i agree with u completely..and its a q that has been plaguing me a long time ....most somalis put culture b4 deen and i've always wondered why....example...FGM...that is cultural not religion based....for some reason, they seem to hold their culture in higher esteem than religion, often disregarding the quran in favor of biased cultural views...and like u, i do believe religion is evoked when a loved one dies or they need help in personal matters....if somalis as a whole got together and unified through deen rather than clan and nationality first, half of our problems wouldn't have existed today...ie-civil war.... peace

quote:X "Tam Tam...don't make me regret my new persona... ...its all very innocent and islamified relationship.... Qac: waaw how disrespectful.. but i'll be the better man..." Qac, is it me or are u bi-polar? where is the disrespect in me playfully saying that all there is btwn us is islam? maybe u seek to always see me in the light where i was drowning u or lynching u in ur previous life.... sense of humour anyone? U'll be in the next flick..."i see a feminist"....ie i see dead ppl.... :eek: XUUX! peace

"I'm just the president? I don't want to be just a sitting duck, so at this point, I will hand in my resignation. Let me add though, that I was once a lone soldier....the backbone of the Coalition infrastructure...and I think I have it me to continue the good fight..and build a new army Besides, I don't like being second in command ;)" DA, lets not get hasty here, don't u see their methods of divide and conquer? how about co-captain?....sisterhood must always be one...so get ur bra burning on and long live feminism Peace

LOL....DA, ur the prez and im the CEO so therefore ur replaceable:)...can't say the same for me....besides FF is climbing the ranks high these days...not to mention Bee, who has long since been a member since JKF was shot "LoooL, how are you suppose to burn those poor falopain tubes, if we(the men) don't bring the FIRE . Am afraid your best bet is waiting in line for the next best faarah" is that right checkmate? :eek: ...ur telling me i gotta put an ad out b4 im shriveled and lonely? no way! I'll stick to burning bras, preferably men :cool: UD-Da is the perfect candidate cause she has long been looking to try a new experiment, why not that ancient godforsaken concept of marriage...(shuddering)...poor DA...i send my condolences Peace

U know the Feminist Coalition voted u as the guinea pig...tell us about this foreign concept of marriage and kids and how u like it...and depending on the answers, we'd choose what path to take...burn the good old falopian tubes or get in line for a decent farah ...u up for the challenge? peace

Ladies, join me in playing the violin for these poor misunderstood, good hearted men, with only good intentions... ...man, we need more of u around... p.s.-ahem...im sure a somali man waiting at the bus on cold rainy day wouldn't be offered a ride from our dear sincere brotha, so pls save us the chilvary routine Peace

DA...for once, just imagine! ...just for that answer, im starting a matchmaking site for u, get u married with kids ASAP...and then ask u that same q... :cool: ...deal? so....bidding starts at ....whatever u can afford peace